Losing a battle

[norsegirl]

I hate admitting defeat, but I'm going to have to do just that on one thing I was pretty firm on for my delivery. It's standard hospital procedure to put in a hep-lock when you walk in the door at the hospital at which I've chosen to deliver (and probably at all hospitals). I figured if I raised enough of a stink that they'd back off and leave me alone. I hate IVs. I have shitty veins and they always collapse, resulting in pain and massive bruising. I don't need to deal with that shit on top of everything else I'll be dealing with. I also don't like the convenience that they represent to the staff when it comes to administering drugs. I want to do this naturally and do everything I can to avoid interventions of any sort. I don't appreciate the idea of the staff having immediate and convenient access to my bloodstream.

Unfortunately, I found out yesterday that I tested positive for Strep B colonization. This means I have to have antibiotics administered by IV every 4 hours during labour. I can't skip it because it could really harm the baby, and I'm guessing they won't just do it by injection. So I'm stuck with the hep lock.

Why do I get the feeling that this is just step 1 of me losing all control over this situation?

In other news I threw my back out last night, so I've been utterly useless all day. All I've really done is nap and eat and do a bit of browsing on the internet. On the bright side, I found a great gift for someone. On the downside, I got nothing done and I have no idea what's for dinner.

Comments

[hel_ana]

Ack. Yeah, I share your concerns.

Have you looked into the feasibility of hiring a doula? The research I've read (which comes out of Henci Goer's book) suggests that mothers who have a doula have dramatically lower rates of interventions and C-sections. A professional doula apparently helps in a way that a husband/SO birth partner doesn't.

[eve-the-just.livejournal.com]

True, but money is tight and I don't feel like I have the time to interview and select anyone at this point. Also I'm a very solitary person when I'm uncomfortable, so the thought of having one more person in the room really doesn't do it for me. If I didn't have time to interview and got someone who got on my nerves that might just make everything worse. My birthing class teacher for example shares on a regular basis that her services are available for just such a thing, but I'm dead sure that if she were in the room I'd find the time between contractions to strangle her.

Also, is it just me or are you irked by the whole Bradley Method emphasis on HUSBAND coach? As if there aren't alternative families. It just feels judgmental to me.

I have no doubts now that Jason will be able to stand up for me anyway. He wanted to kill my ob-gyn when I had spotting after that last exam, and that's a pretty normal side-effect. Heck, if they let the beagles in the room I'm sure Anna would keep everyone at bay. She was pretty pissed off about that incident too.

[eliskimo.livejournal.com]

I had Lasairfhiona (beithgrove) come be my unofficial doula. She was great. I'm sorry that you are in a position where you don't know anyone and can't hire someone. My sister-in-law (Amy) said her doula made all the difference in the world for her (giving birth in Kentucky). But if you want to be solitary, that's a valid choice, too. I was just terrified of being left alone.

I don't know anything about the Bradley Method. I take it that's the class you are taking? Both Joel and Dru lent Jay copies of a book called "The Birth Partner" which, as is pretty obvious from the title, doesn't limit the "birth partner" to husbands only. It might irk you less.

[hel_ana]

Yeah, I can understand all of that. And had to laugh at the finding time to strangle her.

And yes, the emphasis on husband coaching raised an eyebrow, and was one of the reasons I didn't actually buy the book.

spotting after the last exam? Did you blog about that?

[eve-the-just.livejournal.com]

Yup, totally posted about the spotting (http://eve-the-just.livejournal.com/176305.html). But it was buried in with a lot of other chatting. I bled for 48 hours and Anna beagle followed me around everywhere like she was on a leash. Had to check my panties every time I went to the bathroom too. Very concerned beagle. It will be interesting to see how she behaves when I give birth.

I'll be refusing all future vaginal exams because I just don't need the extra discomfort. My doctor is okay with that since they can't tell you anything meaningful anyway.

I haven't read the "Husband Coached Childbirth" book yet, but my brief wander through "The Bradley Method" book didn't impress me much. I've been running with info from Goer's book and the old "what to expect" book. It's interesting to have the contrasting views of completely distrusting the medical professionals and putting it all in their hands. I figure between the two I'll get a more well-rounded view of the reality.

[snowy-owl30.livejournal.com]

My daughter was flipping channels last night and made me suffer through an episode of "18 and counting" (yawntv!). I'm not certain what religion the Duggan Family (they're quite religious though) are but they had friends that were all using the Bradley Method and talking about it as if it was second nature and they all knew it inside and out. I suspect it may only refer to the Husband as coach as it may have some religious roots with traditional denominations.

[eve-the-just.livejournal.com]

No religious roots at all that I can see. There's not a single reference to God in the whole course (which I appreciate immensely). But it's been around since the 1940s, when traditional families were not only the norm, but probably the only model (excepting of course the single mom left behind when the man died in the war). I just feel like it would be nice if they updated their terminology a little.

Bradley method basically is "second nature". No funny breathing, no drugs, just lots of massage and encouraging words from your partner, listen to your body and push when it tells you to, and otherwise try to relax and go with it. The course seems pretty useless to me actually, assuming you and your partner already work well together and know how to relax and calm each other.

[real-jayde.livejournal.com]

Again, as I suggested to Red, pizza for dinner!

As for serious hospital stuff I'm certainly not an expert. I would venture to say make sure you have a birth plan in place with the hospital, make sure Jason (and whoever else is in delivery with you) knows for sure what you want and don't want so that they can advocate for you when you can't advocate for yourself. Don't let doctors or nurses talk to you without them. Maybe try and connect with some mothers who have gone through a natural birth process at that hospital? Can you talk to someone on the unit to alleviate your concerns, like a head nurse or a community liaison?

Remember, the hospital is obligated to do certain things, I'm sure, for insurance reasons as much as anything else. I'm sure that ties their hands a little. I totally understand the IV thing - I hate them like crazy too.

Try and remain positive. We're all rooting for you to have a positive, healthy delivery. From what I hear from gf's experiences, when it comes to giving birth you have to expect the unexpected (look at Em's delivery!). But that doesn't mean you've relinquished control. It just means that things aren't going exactly according to plan. And ultimately the main goal is happy healthy baby and momma.

Hang in there,
Giant Hugs!

[eve-the-just.livejournal.com]

look at Em's delivery!

You know, she never posted anything about it, and when I last saw her I didn't know I was pregnant yet so it didn't come up. I have absolutely no idea what happened except that she was transferred to hospital at some point.

I'm not sure how much having a birth plan will help. I get the impression that health care providers down here treat them rather dismissively. In fact, a little part of me wonders if you might actually get treated WORSE if you provide one, because you've highlighted yourself as "difficult". Birth is a business here. Preventing lawsuits and protecting the bottom line seem to be far higher priorities than giving people a good experience or even providing good care that promotes their health.

[real-jayde.livejournal.com]

Em had planned for a home delivery. She had a Midwife and a Dula I believe. However, after labouring for hours, they had to transfer her to the hospital and she later gave birth there. I can't remember any more details but it just goes to show that even if you have a clear plan, it can be quickly shot to the wind.

Sometimes being difficult isn't a bad thing. What is the saying, "The squeaky wheel gets the grease"? If it really is a business they should be working to satisfy their customers. Right? Maybe not. But, as Arnora says, if you want expectations to be met, you need to be vocal about them. Or at least have someone be vocal for you :).

Strep B?

[firefred.livejournal.com]

I have no idea what this is, but it sounds awful. I realize you have other concerns than plants at the moment. It's not staph aureus, is it? Sorry about your back. I hope you can relax. Can't your husband bring dinner? It does not matter that you got 'nothing done', you are pregnant!

Re: Strep B?

[eve-the-just.livejournal.com]

It's a fairly common thing (10-30% of women are estimated to have it) and if treated it's no big deal. Either way it won't harm me, but untreated it may harm the baby. And no, strep and staph are different. I'm just annoyed that it means I have to have the IV, it's nothing to actively worry about though.

Yes, the hubby could bring dinner, but we've been eating out since Friday, when the back started feeling a little off, so I'm starting to feel a bit guilty about the expense.

IV

[firefred.livejournal.com]

I totally hated the IV. I had one when I had my knee operated. Once they were done I had to ask them repeatedly to just take it out. They also treated me like an idiot. Do I have to say I do not care for that? In your case, I think a doula might be a really good idea. But then, perhaps not, since you do not have the time to get to learn about someone new at this point. The beagles would see you through, but they are not allowed, right? :) Other relatives that could be there with you? I basically think your husband can deal with it. I sincerely hope so. hang tough, it will be over soon! Hugs.

[rectangularcat]

ug, i feel for you. a lot. i have the same reservations about the iv and so want to avoid one too.

i am confident that you will not lose all control about the situation and if you end up with an intervention it will be with your consent and approval.

i wish it were possible to research and pre-plan ahead of time - pain is a difficult mindset to make decisions in BUT I am confident you and jason will make it work. i know you will and you'll end up with a cute baby too at the end! how awesome is that!

[eve-the-just.livejournal.com]

you'll end up with a cute baby too at the end! how awesome is that!

It's the only reason to go through all this, that's for sure. A means to an end very much worth having.