I'm a fucking rock star

Last night we were not let out of hospital as I'd hoped. I was discharged but Georgia is jaundiced (common in Mediterranean people, which I'm not but Jason is) so we've been kept in hospital. She has to have these UV blankets on her skin to break up the yellow pigment so her liver can digest it (which in a Mediterranean climate would be accomplished by the sun of course) and the pediatrician ordered supplementing her diet with formula so she would pass it faster. The pediatrician who made this order did so by passing the information to me through a nurse (that I haven't gotten along with in the best way thusfar; her grasp of English is poor at best and I ask too many questions I think). When I asked to speak to the pediatrician about this order (because I don't want my daughter fed formula; it's not good for her and it will mess up my breastmilk production) I was informed that she'd issued the order and gone home. I was pretty growly. By the time Jason came back from feeding the dogs I was livid and in tears (frustration does that to me) over the whole thing.

Fortunately, the ESL nurse went off-shift and was replaced by the most wonderful pro-breast-feed night-nurse. Without even being asked she offered me an alternative (pump and deliver that by bottle to supplement since Georgia is a bit weak to suckle that much). She then went to another pediatrician to make it an official second-opinion order. I diligently pumped all night, never getting more than 3ml at a time, which is a bit weak since they wanted to supplement with 20ml of formula per feeding. By morning I was exhausted and on the night nurse's recommendation skipped our last feeding in favour of sleep for both Georgia's and my sake.

In the morning, ESL nurse returned and berated me for not following her orders. She agreed with the doctor and I shouldn't have been questioning her opinion obviously. She was also upset with me for skipping the 6am feeding. She gave the whole "nothing went wrong in this case but it could have and we issue orders for a reason" thing. To which I replied "which is why I sought a second opinion and got approval for an alternative treatment". I went into my morning routine angry with her yet again, but happy I'd stood my ground.

And this is when everything went right. Had a rather lack-luster morning feeding (only managed 15 minutes because Georgia is damn tired) but when I went to the pump a mere 15 minutes was rewarded with an astounding 30ml of the good stuff! More than needed to supplement! I felt like a fucking rock star. I have never felt such triumph as I did in the moment I measured out those results. I then went to the nurse with it to ask for a label for the fridge. The look of shock on her face was priceless. Needless to say there is no more talk of formula. She happily came and showed us how to bottle feed her the stored milk after the last feeding and is finally leaving me be.

Good thing I showed her that lot because our next feeding came up rather soon and the pump after was not nearly as rewarding. But that's okay because now I've proven my methods are not ridiculous, that formula is not needed in this case and that really, mother does know best.

I may not have been able to go natural for childbirth, but winning the breast milk fight made me feel empowered as a mum. There really is nothing like winning a fight for your child, it's a really special feeling you just don't get from anything else.

Jason took some pics of globaby. She looks a bit like those dorky modified cars with the lights under them.

Smooth sailing

Everything is going along as it should. Georgia is well out of the danger zone for her jaundice. We've got her down to one light blanket (either on the top or bottom rather than both), tomorrow morning if she tests well we'll go down to no blankets for 4 hours of observation and if we pass again we get to go home. The feedings are going well. Pumping is producing consistently in the 20-30 ml range. I've actually decided on the next couple feedings that we'll do breast or bottle rather than both. That way either Jason or I will wake up but not both of us. The hospital gave me a hand-pump (part of the package with all the bits that you use on the real pump that come in contact with milk) so I might continue to pump and store when we get home just so we can share the late-night duties for a bit. I'll have to see how the hand-pumping goes. I might experiment with it tonight before we leave the hospital in case I need help figuring it out.

My milk is in now and yikes but my boobs look strange. This morning they had expanded to the absolute perfect stage. If I was ever going to get a boob job, that's what they would look like. A nice, probably B-cup (I didn't have any way to actually measure), perky but still very natural looking. As of right now they look like total failed boob jobs. It's like someone got implants just a bit too large, so you can see the edges all around, and then the implants went hard. No word of a lie, it absolutely looks like bad, hardened silicone under the skin. I can't say for sure if they're a B or C right now as I am not a good judge of these things. I wonder if they will soften up or what will happen here. They're also pretty painful and leaky. I'm putting ice packs on them and I just washed up and applied my Lilypadz and that seems to be working. Then again, Georgia hasn't cried since I put them on, so we'll have to see how they hold up when that happens.

The other part of me that looks very odd is my belly. Of course the skin and muscles are all stretched and loose but now that they're not stretched over a baby they're hanging very low. I've got a binding girdle-like thingy on right now to smooth it all out and give some support so it doesn't hurt when I walk so much. When I take it off it looks like I've stuffed a basketball under my skin very low on my pelvis. I look fine from the base of my rib cage up and positively tear-shaped and freaky below that. I wonder how long it will take that to look at least half-way normal. I'm not talking freakishly well-toned abs or anything, just not bizarre pouchy thing.

The world's best life-saver of a night nurse is back on shift again tonight. Found out that we all play WoW and on the same server though she's Alliance. Ah well, we're not all perfect ;)

Lauren arrived today around 5ish. They came and hung out with me here and kept me company for a few hours, just left actually. They're going to keep the hounds company tonight so Jason is staying with me again.

I'm also super-hungry all the time. I really wish the cafeteria was still open right now. I could use some extra anything. I've sent Jason home to bring me fruit. Hopefully that will tide me over until "room service" re-opens at 7am.

Wish us luck for a speedy departure tomorrow. I know that I am eager to get out into the fresh air and sunshine again. I'm also eager to see how the beagles take to the new arrival. All signs so far point to a happy welcoming into the household. Jason brought home a hat that she'd been wearing for a few days so the beagles could have a sniff. They REALLY liked it. When he got out of the shower he found they'd taken it to bed and curled up around it. And when Jason picked it up to take it away Lizzy licked it. We plan to introduce them by putting Georgia in a crib or playpen and allowing them to sniff her through the bars/mesh. That way they can't accidentally get too rambunctious and jump on her or hurt her in any way. Not sure how long it will be until we let them get any contact without that safe-space between them. I'm sure they wouldn't do anything to hurt her intentionally, but over-excited beagles are a bit dangerous for a little one.